I'm not particularly a jazz fan nor a baseball fan, but because someone lent me Ken Burns' magnificent documentary series on both those subjects and because there is All This Time, I have - well, not so much learned as been reminded that any story on any subject can be made interesting by how it's told. I have been fascinated by every moment of those series, and have learned a great deal about both those subjects.
I've learned that it is just as important, albeit somewhat stickier, to clear out one's no-longer-friends as it is to clear out one's closet.
I've learned, or am learning, to chew more slowly and savor my food more. Sweet Hubby suggested that a few weeks ago, so now one of us reminds the other at every meal. And what a difference. I wasn't aware how quickly and thoughtlessly I wolfed down food, always having the next bite on my fork while I barely chewed the one in my mouth, until I began to become conscious as I ate, to be present, to truly taste what I was eating. It's going to be a while before this new habit overtakes the old, but in a way, it's almost like a spiritual practice, making mealtime more significant, calmer, more enjoyable.
I've learned that I love to have a puff, put on music, and dance my ass off. I wish I'd known this a long time ago. It's like the perfect antidote to almost all demonic problems.
Thanks to Zoom, I now know what I look like when I talk. It's really tough not to be shatteringly self-conscious. It helps to remember that everyone who knows me is already used to this face, as I am to theirs, and so far no one has turned away in disgust, so I do my best to put my attention on listening to whomever I'm talking with instead of going down the dark internal tunnel of "Oh my god, when did I get jowls? Why didn't I inherit my mother's generous lips? My eyes are so tiny! If I suck in my neck, I can't talk but one of my chins disappears, sort of."
The biggest eye opener, though, is that I've had a chance to see what life is probably going to be like for me and Sweet Hubby when we get older. At some point, we are no doubt going to want to - or have to - live more quietly, stay home more, ease into a more elderly pace. Sort of like we've been living the past few months during the COVID lockdown. And I've discovered that I rather like this pace. I like kicking around the house, doing a few chores, reading, taking walks or working out to a tape, writing when I feel like it, snugging in with Sweet Hubby and kitty Flow at the end of the day to watch a movie. I'm not ready to slow down quite yet; there's still travel I want to do, friends and family to visit, and, once it's safe, I very much want to start going to theater again, and out to eat, and have friendly gatherings. But I know now that the quieter life of the elderly which probably awaits us is going to be pleasant, and better than pleasant, and that I don't have to be afraid of the future. I know we might get sideswiped by disease or losses or various infirmities. I don't really know what's coming. But still, I am liking life right now, even including its imposed limitations, and if this is what's in store, that's okay by me.
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